Angela Killian

There is one aspect of Thai (and possibly all Asian) culture that I can never quite grasp. The beauty and social standards for women demand “cuteness”.

In addition to wearing scrunchies (did those come back in style?) and ribbons in their hair, grown Thai women braid or make their hair into pigtails. I’ve seen many other women of all nationalities do this as well. For lack of any other way to pull my hair back, one day I wore my hair in a braid to work. The office girls immediately complimented me and said I looked, “soft like a baby”. Do grown women want to look soft or baby-like?

Everyone is obsessed with looking young these days thanks to the Botox and cosmetic industry. While I don’t want any wrinkles, I also don’t want to look like a teenager. Thai woman are lucky to have baby faces. I honestly can never tell how old someone is in Thailand. Petite women look like teenagers when they are actually a 40 year old divorcée with kids.

The fake braces trend in Thailand doesn’t help these women look more mature. I was clueless about this fad until my assistant at work showed up wearing braces one day. I asked why she got braces (her teeth were absolutely perfect before) and she said, “because it’s cute”. Really? Sure I wanted braces when I was in elementary school because all the kids who had them could change the colors to match holiday themes, but I was blessed with straight teeth. Before my assistant enlightened me, I thought people simply couldn’t afford braces until they were older because you see a lot of grown people wearing them in Thailand. Now I know that it’s nothing more than a status symbol.

Here is an article about the braces trend via Vice.

By no choice of my own, I watch Thai TV in the staff canteen at work with the help of my officemates for translation. One day the Thai version of E was on and there were reporters interviewing Thai celebrities walking down the red carpet. One of the women was too shy to talk to the reporter so she flung herself  to the ground to avoid the microphone. I asked why she would do that and my officemates said, “because she’s acting like a child and it’s cute”. Again, I thought “Really?”

Thai people will never admit it, but I believe this “culture of cute” stems from Japan. They are the founders of the “kawaii” movement with anime, Hello Kitty and all things adorable. “Kawaii” basically translates to “cute” and here’s how you can achieve it.

When I was in Japan I saw grown women wearing animal ears and Mickey Mouse socks. It also seems that they only believe in ruffle child-like “granny panties” because I didn’t see thong underwear in any of the lingerie stores. They also have the weirdest pornography (gynecologist office voyeur cam?) and “maid cafes”, but that’s a whole other story.

In such a homogeneous culture, I feel for the Thai women who are like me and want to only be themselves, not “soft like a baby”. Some foreign women despise Thai girls for being cute. Partly because they are jealous and partly because the cuteness is just annoying.

The root of why it bothers me is because it is a prime example of society forcing beauty standards on women. Thai women think I’m crazy for wanting to be tan. I think they’re crazy for bleaching their skin. At the end of the day, we’re all insane for trying to keep up with society’s ever-changing and often impossible beauty standards.