Angela Killian

Corruption in Thailand, especially Phuket, is increasingly blasted on local news. However, as a foreigner, I’ve only benefitted from corruption. You can bribe your way out of speeding tickets & drunk driving. You can even bribe your way out of drug possession in small quantities. I know that these practices only hurt the country in the long run, but after living in a rule stricken place like the US, Thailand life is much easier. No need to go to court, just pay the officer instead and you are off the hook. No harm no foul. Except sometimes there is a foul & that’s a big problem…

Below are some corruption cases and bizarre situations that my friends or myself have encountered in Thailand.

Drunk Driving

In the past year I have had 3 friends (all expats) get into drunk driving accidents. I am sympathetic to them in their decisions to drink and drive due to the ongoing taxi mafia problem that is exclusive to Phuket province. Taxi / tuk tuk drivers refuse to use the meter and have even denied driving to certain parts of the island due to rival taxi gangs or lack of motivation to take you there. If you DO manage to find a taxi / tuk tuk after a night of drinking, you can rest assured that they will rip you off by double the price. Then, you get the privilege of repeating this activity the following morning when you are hung over and need to take a taxi / tuk tuk back to wherever you left your car. There is no train and the bus system has been a slow-moving process due to the taxi mafia’s attempts to stop it along with the general disorganization of the country. Taxi mafia members protested to my former hotel employer because they felt we were “stealing” their clients by offering airport pick up to hotel guests. Hellooooo, the guests wouldn’t even be on their turf if it wasn’t for the 5 star hotel. On Christmas I brought them a jar of candy. The leader didn’t even say thank you, but he did say, “this isn’t enough for my staff”.  These are not people you want to mess with and there is no sense in reasoning with entitled ignorant people. But I digress…

Still, I know drunk driving is a terribly selfish thing to do. I’m just saying that people do it for a reason, not because they enjoy it.

So, one of these expat friends has been in multiple fender benders in Phuket, but last year he injured another person who is unable to walk anymore as a result. The friend did go to jail for that accident, but was immediately released after coughing up enough money to the police.

Another friend drinks and drives frequently, like so many expats do, but he has never been in an accident. The police recently set up a permanent drunk driving checkpoint on the beach road leaving town. I was surprised to know they even use breathalyzers, but who can be sure of the accuracy. So, this friend blew above the threshold for measurable sobriety one night. After long discussions between the 3 checkpoint police, they asked my friend for a bribe of 3,000 THB ($100 USD). Outraged by the corruption, my friend showed them his work permit and car registration to prove he has been a Phuket resident for a long time and even contributes by paying 30% income tax. He then asked the police to take him to jail and refused to pay the bribe knowing that they never actually planned on taking any drunk drivers to jail that night. 1 police would have to drive my friend’s car and 1 police would have to take him to jail, which wouldn’t leave enough manpower at the checkpoint to accept bribes for the remainder of the night.

A girlfriend of mine was drunk driving very late at night and hit the side of the road indicating to nearby police that she was intoxicated. The only damage done was to her rental car. The police immediately asked her for a 20,000 THB ($800 USD) bribe. She informed them that she didn’t have that much cash on her and that they would have to take her to jail. After discussions in Thai, the police decided that 10,000 THB bribe would be acceptable so she paid and went on her way.

The last friend wasn’t as lucky as the others. I had only met her a few times at bars and she died this year in a drunk driving accident. She was on her way home alone from the bar and drove her car off the side of the road into the forest. She was already dead when police found her the next day.

While I have never been in a drunk driving situation, but I can definitely see the benefit of having bribery as an option. A drunk driving record can ruin your life in the US even if you have never been in an accident. Whereas in Thailand people are hurt badly from drunk driving and are allowed to pay their way out with no record or real sanction.

Fast Lane at Airport Immigration

Nothing is worse after a 20+ hour trip than waiting in the painfully long immigration line. There will inevitably be large Chinese and Russian families who failed to properly fill out their arrival cards along with screaming children. For some reason, people with unruly kids think they deserve special treatment in travel situations, but that’s another topic altogether. Lately there has been an unadvertised fast lane at Phuket International Airport. For the price of 100 THB ($3 USD) you get to cut the immigration line and proceed to the luggage claim area. However, due to the recent military crackdown on corruption, this fast lane is no longer available.

No Seatbelt

I have been pulled over for no seatbelt one time. It’s important to note that the police typically look for seatbelts or other minor offenses during meal hours – hey, police need money for lunch too! I was driving back from Krabi province after a long weekend of partying. The car was full of empty beer bottles, which isn’t technically illegal, but open containers are. The police managed to explain to me in English that the fine for no seatbelt was 500 THB ($15 USD). I explained to him that I do not know where the police office / court house is where I am supposed to pay the fine. I then asked if I could simply pay him the 500 THB directly. He glanced over his soldier at his partner, who was smoking a cigarette on his motorbike and said, “only 300” under his breath. We rummaged around the car to find the money and I handed it to him. He would not accept it in front of his partner. I’m terrible in secret transactions, even worse in tipping scenarios and don’t even ask me to do illegal money exchanges because I don’t know how to play it cool. I folded the three 100 THB bills into a small bundle and offered it to the police in my lap. He laughed in the typical Thai way, indicating that he was not feeling humorous, but was masking his true feelings. He reached inside the car slowly and took the money and sent us on our way. He definitely could have gotten us in more trouble had he searched the car and found the empty bottles, but his main objective was lunch money.

No Helmet

Many Thai people do not wear helmets, despite the annual free helmet giveaway sponsored by the government and the cheesy advertisements. Don’t get me wrong, people collect their free helmets, but never use them for some reason. Until the recent crackdown, only foreigners were stopped for not wearing helmets and fined 100 – 300 THB ($3 – $10 USD) on the spot. I have seen far too many bloody accidents and dead bodies in the street from motorbike accidents so I am happy they are finally enforcing helmets for everyone, not only the foreigners who can afford to pay the bribe.

Grand Theft Auto

Joe and I went to see a DJ play at a large, but secluded hotel last year. We chose to take a taxi there to avoid drinking and driving. We left the hotel around 2am and the DJ was still playing (guess I’m too old for house music shows) and proceeded to the concierge where we planned to get a taxi or overpriced hotel car to take us home. There was a line of about 10 people who were frustrated and waiting for rides as well. They said they had been waiting there for over 30 minutes and that there were no taxis driving by. It’s no secret that Thais are more laid back than Westerners, particularly the taxi drivers. I politely asked the concierge if the hotel driver or hotel car could take us home. He informed me that the hotel car driver was sleeping. Most of the DJ patrons were locals from Phuket and were not staying at the hotel that night. How could they not have planned for taxi pick-ups after people have been drinking and probably doing drugs all night? The concierge wouldn’t even call a taxi company for us so the only option was to wait and hope that one drove by. At 2am, the chances were slim in the isolated hotel, not to mention we were at the back of the line.

At one point the concierge and buggy boy left the lobby area and we saw the empty golf cart just sitting there. Joe remembered that he had his golf cart key from work. He ran over to the cart and tried to start it with his key. I was sure the golf cart company would have different keys for each vehicle, but low and behold, it worked! So we all piled in the golf cart and drove to the security gate, where the guard smiled, waved and let us leave. We intended to drive only to the main road where we could ditch it and get a taxi, but we were having so much fun that we drove about 3 KM to a little strip mall filled with bars. We parked across the street safely and ran over to one of the bars to hide from the police that may / may not have been coming. Shortly after, a truck pulled up and 5 police hopped out. They were obviously on a mission to find whoever stole the golf cart. We all agreed to plea the 5^th and split up. Joe and I went to another bar and proceeded to the street after we saw the police go inside the original bar we were at. We walked very slowly holding hands to hopefully fool them into thinking we were an innocent couple on vacation. The police saw us and yelled “STOP!” We played dumb and remained calm, but the police erratically forced us to the ground with our hands raised. Joe was particularly good at playing the victim in this situation- you don’t want the police to lose face or feel threatened. I said nothing while Joe apologized profusely in Thai with his hands in the wai position on this chest. The police paid no attention to me until they asked Joe if I was his wife. Joe said, “yes” and the dynamics changed immediately, which was strange. I think they felt bad for making Joe lose face in front of his wife and they also realized they were getting nowhere by asking if we took the golf cart. I was in shorts and sandals and the police could see that the gravel ground was hurting my knees so they told us we could stand up. Then they began telling Joe, “Thai people not bad people, Thai people are good people, we are sorry” and they released us after giving Joe a hug! So many things happened that night that never would have happened in any developed country. We also wouldn’t have borrowed a golf cart in the US, but then again, the concierge would have called us a taxi in the US or woke the driver up! Needless to say we weren’t in any real trouble because we made ourselves small in front of the police and they felt bad for us.  I’m sure we were the talk of the hotel in the following meetings in an effort to tighten up on security measures…and hopefully hire competent (awake) drivers.